Communicating with the World  

Sometimes when I listen to older pieces of mine (usually later at night and I'm a bit woozy with booze), I think - what chance have these to communicate to anyone? It's like listening to another world - another universe. I can understand them, but only just. Then one is, as so often, and perhaps centrally, left with a fundamental question about any artistic endeavour - how much do I owe to other people in terms of expression, in terms of how much I feel artistic quality depends on who and how many people listen to or appreciate what one does. On the one hand, what is the purpose of this sort of communication if it doesn't get through to anyone else?, but on the other, why should I care, as long as I have some opportunity to hear and appreciate my own stuff. This is, after all, in as much as I can define it, me. In any other area do I worry about this? Do I care if anyone else appreciates or understands the way in which I dress or bathe or clean my teeth? And these areas are, in anything, far less myself than any of the music.